Giving Thanks on Thanksgiving

Today is Thanksgiving, 2014. It hasn’t been one of my more traditional Thanksgivings; a number of my favorite Thanksgiving traditions had to be put aside for one reason or another. I usually like to make sure I have a bowl of onion and sour cream dip along with a big bag of potato chips or corn chips and munch as I sit and watch the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day parade as well as the National dog show. But, my TV has decided that it doesn’t want to be watched and as soon as I click it on, it clicks itself off. I haven’t figured out its problem yet and really haven’t had much time for it anyway. As for the other, well, my funds ran out, and I really don’t need them anyway.

It really hasn’t been a great year full of unending happiness since last Thanksgiving, especially because of the loss of Russ and the possibility of my joining him at one point. And yet, I must recognize that there have been so many blessings for which I feel I should be eternally thankful.

Yes, it’s true, Russ left me on December 28, 2013, leaving a gap that will probably remain empty for a very long time. Yet, I am so grateful for those five years that I had with him. He was a wonderful friend; he kept me happy, made me laugh with his crazy one-liners, kept me entertained with his music and helped me feel my worth. He gave me support when I needed it, and kept me on my toes; he gave me hugs when I was down and a shoulder when I needed to cry. He encouraged me, prodded me and protected me. And, I’m very thankful that I will be able to see him again.

I’m thankful for the roof over my head. I have been in this apartment for 6 years now. I thought I would have to leave when Russ died, but in one way or another, I have always been able to find a way to pay my rent, every month. Here, I feel at home and here I feel Russ’ presence around me. I’m thankful for the talents that God has given to me, that have helped me get the money I need to pay the rent. If I hadn’t had an ear for foreign languages and a knack and eye for creating jewelry, I don’t know where I’d be now.

I’m thankful for my family and friends, and especially for those friends who have become family to me. They have done so much to help me through my prolonged period of grief. If I need them, they are there; more than one of them has a bent ear from listening to my tearful  stories. I’m so thankful to them for helping me out when Russ first died and for helping me get my feet back on the ground. I would like to add my Church to this group. I am ever so grateful to the teachings of the Church, but also for the members who put into practice these teachings. Their willingness to share both their strength and love with me, as well as shoulder my pain and grief, has been essential to my well-being. I am thankful for Heavenly Father who gave us his Son to be our Savior, so that we might return to his presence. And I’m thankful for this Christmas period in which many of us celebrate the birth of this Son, Jesus Christ. May we all be blessed with his peace.

I’m thankful for the doctors who have worked to keep my body chugging, even when I personally would have liked to give up and join Russ. From January to July I lived in a state of constant turmoil, unsure as to what I would prefer: join Russ or stay here and drive everyone crazy with my well-known idiosyncrasies. But  thanks to the very competent doctors of Kings County Hospital Center, I’m still here and in a somewhat better state of mind than before.

I’m also thankful to my clients that have also become friends. They have been so patient with me as I have struggled to keep my mind on their work. At this point I would like to thank one in particular, Flavio Girardelli. I had only a thousand or so words left on his book; in fact, I was working on it when Russ had his heart attack and so I had to let everything drop while I stayed with Russ in the hospital. Thank you, Flavio, for your patience and friendship.

There are so many other things, small, ordinary things as well as unusual things, for which I am thankful—the purring of my cat when I feed her, the song of the cardinal in my backyard and even the acrobatic antics of the bushy-tailed tree rats—but, I’m writing a blog, not a novel (another of the talents for which I am thankful), so I will content myself with these. Except for one—I am thankful for all of you who read my blog; you make me feel that yes, it is worth the time and effort. So again, Thank you to all of you.

And, I’m thankful for the meal I was able to prepare for tonight (and probably the year ahead of me). I’m also thankful I have a freezer…

 

“Giving Thanks on Thanksgiving” ©27 November 2014 Mary Purpari . All Rights Reserved.